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The Unknown Road

[T.  of “As Long  as I’m Singing” a rock n’ roller with a good sense of humor who embraces his faith recently confessed he talks to his blog. It was a great relief to me that I was not the only one! T. asks “Would your life be any different, fundamentally, if you were the opposite sex of the one you are now?”]

As I look at the dishes in the kitchen, the garden that needs tending, and  the laundry piled in the basement. I sit and attempt to focus on my computer screen as two little widgets run about around the table, “Mom! Can we have a snack!”

I graciously grab the snack, send them outside, and try to regain my thoughts!  I sigh, where  was I going? Who am I? What would life be if I were a man? 

I reflect back, think of my early twenties, and retreat to my shelf examining the beat – up copy of Dharma Bums by Jack Kerouac. As  I gaze at the cover I dream I was traveling the open road with my knap sack never knowing the adventure that rambled around the corner.

Now that was the life and that was a man. If I was a man Dharma Bums would have been my bible. I would be the man without responsibility traveling down the unknown road.

I would rely only on my knapsack, a journal, and life free of responsibility. My quest to search for meaning, listening to jazz, and meeting a motley crew of characters along the way.

However, as a woman the freedom to hitchhike or hop a train eludes me.  The freedom of living the life carefree without concern of security, roaming the earth, and enjoying the fine mountain grass evades my presence.

It is the now that I look at the messy house, the weedy garden, and look to my children. I have a home full of warmth and love. It is this security that surrounds me with a warm  blanket.

It might not be the freedom of the open road but it keeps me grounded.  It is by staying grounded I learn that  life is about how you live it and embrace it. The open road will always be there to roam, characters will come and go, but to me there truly is no place like home.

Do you long for the open road? Or do believe there is no place like home?

Categories: creative writing Dharma Bums feminism fiction Jack Kerouac Life motherhood musings random thoughts thoughts

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Darcie

Darcie Cameron is a RYT 200 who believes Yoga is a gift that is accessible to everyone with proper modifications, a patient smile and just taking the time to breathe. One of the greatest presents you will ever unwrap is when you connect your mind, body and spirit in perfect sync with your own breath. Connect with Darcie on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/darciecameronlovesyoga

24 replies

  1. One benefit of being a writer, you can live through any story you want! Besides, to your new friends – you’re just about perfect! Dwell on that for a few minutes, then live on! Those that know you best will be in awe (yes, I promise!)

  2. I like this. I think we can have both, just not at the same time. Sometimes there’s the call to the wild and adventure and we can follow that, even it’s just a day in park or an art museum, or a writing class or an art class. Whatever. Sometimes there’s that need for home and warmth. We are – deep down I believe – nurturers.

    Something tells me you would like Women Who Run With the Wolves by Pinkola Estes. Have you ever read it? If not, I think you’d really get into the stories and myths. I enjoyed it a great deal.

    1. It’s true it’s about finding balance between the call to roam and the time spent nurturing. We can do it all in small steps without hanging off the back of a train. However, the train does seem tempting at times.

      I have not read Women Who Run with the Wolves. But will add it to my list and enjoy it on a quiet Sunday afternoon when I get to roam to the nearest Starbucks 😉

  3. What a good question… I think the idea of an open road sounds so exciting. I know, especially during a bad day, or stressful times, I always think how I would love to just hop in my car and drive, or take a random plane, somewhere… but, if I actually had the chance to do it, I know I wouldn’t…. I think I am more “there is no place like home” but sometimes I wonder what home is… Is it a place or a feeling?

    1. A very good question! I think it is what we make it and how we surround ourselves with our loved ones. It would be great just to hop on a plane or car and go without a care in the world. But I think I’m too much of a homebody. I love the comforts of home.

  4. Your’e describing the man I would have loved to be in different circmstances. I always loved Jack Kerouac but a house with young kiddies and being surrounded by those you love may not be so glamorous but it is richly rewarding. So I love domestic life but | also love adventure and to be challanges. on holiday

    1. It is a richly rewarding life and one built on the foundation of love and happiness. If circumstances were different what do you think we would have learned being on the road? I think it would make us more selfish and unaware of so much more around us. I also love the call of adventures and the luxury of a pool bar on holiday 😉

  5. Thanks so much for answering! And i, for one, am pretty thrilled to find that i’m apparently much more in touch with my feminine side than i had previously thought =)

  6. I love the idea of backpacking around the world, and used to watch Lonely Planet religiously every Saturday morning. I bought guide books, built savings, and just never got around to making it happen. Marriage with children is actually what happened 🙂 But my daughter wants to see the world so badly, that maybe this all worked out for the best. When we’re ready, we’ll go together, and I’ll get the treat of seeing all of that discovery through her eyes, too!

  7. I think we would all be better people if we could live as the opposite sex for a while. I’m glad I’m not a man: with this character, I’d get beaten up a lot 🙂

    1. I think we would have a much better understanding of the opposite sex if we trudged in their shoes for a little bit. Hahaha! I highly doubt you would ever getting beaten up! You have such a funny personality and a motley crew of bloggers to defend you 😉

  8. I’ve been longing for the open road, but it never materialized in timing. So, now I am trying to get my life organized and cleaned up before I can get my on the road. I just saw the movie “The Way” directed and written by Emilio Estavez. Now that is a pilgrimage looking inward on a journey.

    1. I haven’t heard or seen it! I will have to check-out! It sounds like a movie I would enjoy. It’s funny how time goes by so quick – you must be excited for your journey to Costa Rica! I would love to go there and travel…One of many places on my bucket list!

  9. I think the long open road, is romanticized, soon enough we all miss the familiar the known. I left home looking for an adventure, and when I came back home it was no longer the same. Perhaps I had changed so much, and my home, was still the same. Now, nothing really fits. So I’m in the search for a knew home 🙂

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