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The Imaginary Cat Burglar

As I sat sipping my tea, enjoying the silence of the house, and at the same time cursing at two semi-written blog posts that refused to come together. I sighed, I took deep breath, and went to NaBloPoMo for  writing prompt inspiration. It was there I heard a noise!

It sounded like someone was entering the house! I listened was someone quietly creeping across the floor? I felt a flush of panic! What do I do? I had to inspect but I couldn’t go upstairs unarmed. It with that I did what any reasonable person would do!  I grabbed the first two things that were in my reach a candle stick and a bottle of Windex. Yes! I was armed and ready to face that noise!

As I crept up the stairs, I let the dog run ahead, I slowly turned the corner the living room discovering it was empty. I then investigated the kitchen.  I sighed there was no sign of anyone on the main floor. I quietly moved upstairs gripping my Windex bottle. Ready to Squirt! I held it out inspected the bedrooms and opened closet doors with trepidation.

It was  only after throughly investigating my whole home I came to the conclusion my mind was playing tricks on me. It was just me, my dog, and an imaginary cat burglar.It was at that very moment I realized I needed to stop reading Jame Patterson novels three nights in a consecutive row. It had turned me into a paranoid creature.

It was then I looked down at my hands clutching the candle stick and the bottle of Windex. Really? How was I going to defend myself with these two objects? I think the absurdity in my selection of weapons of self-defense would have made any hardened criminal run!

What would be the first thing you would grab from your home office/desk if you thought your home was being invaded by a cat burglar?

Categories: blog Blogging Cat Burglar creative writing fun funny Humor Life my life NaBloPoMo writing Writing Prompt

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Darcie

Darcie Cameron is a RYT 200 who believes Yoga is a gift that is accessible to everyone with proper modifications, a patient smile and just taking the time to breathe. One of the greatest presents you will ever unwrap is when you connect your mind, body and spirit in perfect sync with your own breath. Connect with Darcie on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/darciecameronlovesyoga

26 replies

  1. Windex?!?! Bah ha ha! It’s so funny to me because I would have done exactly the same thing. I once stood in my front window with the phone in one hand and a can of cooking spray in the other because I was sure someone was trying to break in. Hilarious!

  2. Well now see here… I am born Texas girl. We live for this kind of thing. I would mosely down to the gaming room and pondered my weapon of choice.Do I get the military bow and arrow? Do I get the Machette? Do I get the 12 guage shot gun? WHat about the 30odd 6 rifle? Decisions. Decisions.
    By the time I figure it out and walk out to confront the intruder … they will be along their way with the tv, computers, and gaming systems.
    Ahhh to be Texan!

  3. Haha I’ve been in similar situations to you where I’ve been home alone and then I think I hear an unusual noise. I opened the door where I thought I heard it from carefully too and had something in my hand, I forget what I grabbed. It was something like yours too that probably wouldn’t have done me much good, lol.

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