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A Mop! A Mop! A Cleaning Lady for a Mop!

I once had ambitions  just like Richard the III and dreamed of my own matriarchal  kingdom. It would be  a shiny beacon that would make Martha Stewart envious of my organizational skills. In the past week I have washed, scrubbed toilets, and de-cluttered  almost all of the closets. It was only within moments my homes squeaky clean appearance was tarnished…

The aftermath of my madness was questionable, but what lead to this madness? Was it that I gave Mr. MBA too much free rein last night when he did the laundry? Or was it  giving the kids too much freedom in their room  not policing where they put their toys and laundry? I’m unsure where or when my madness occurred but when it did everyone took cover!

I awoke this morning groggy, getting breakfast ready, packing lunches, listening to the sound of my coffee brewing in the tassimo (my one trusted friend ) it was when my little man yelled, “Mom where are my socks?”

“Your Dad put them away last night they should be in your top drawer.”

“They’re not!”

My second son, “Mine are not either!”

My husband came trudging down the stairs in his wrinkled dress pants and shirt. I gave him the once over “Did you stuff the dryer full?”


“Why would you do that everything is going to be wrinkled!”

“Don’t worry I’ll fix it.”

He went downstairs and put his wrinkled clothes in the empty dryer. I thought to myself not a word just I just need my coffee.

“Mom! I still don’t have any socks!”

I wandered upstairs and looked at his room. My ears began to turn red “Where is your floor? What have you done? I just cleaned this yesterday!”

He gave me his sweet eyes, “I don’t know!”

I went back to the kitchen to discover the dog in the garbage. It was everywhere the remnants of last nights spaghetti sauce. I was biting my tongue, keeping my cool, the dog gave me the look, and took cover in her crate.

Mr. MBA reappeared smoothed out and ready to face his day! “Did you put away the kids clothes last night?”


“That’s funny I can’t find their socks. I’ll go look in the laundry room.”

As I hit the bottom of the basement steps,  and entered the family room. I looked and discovered a pile of clean socks in the centre of the floor.

“Mr. MBA could you come here!”

I heard the foot steps slowly come down the stairs. “Yes!”

“What’s this?”

“It’s the kids socks.”

“Why are they in the middle of the floor?”

“I thought they could just match as they go!”

“You thought? You thought? You thought they could  match and go?”

“Is that what your mother did?”

“Well no!”

“So do you think I want to look at a pile of socks every time I watch TV?”

Mr. MBA slinked up the stairs “I think I better go now.”

All of my Better Home and Garden dreams thwarted with a blink of an eye. I felt dizzy with the onset of madness and all  I could do was declare  “A Mop! A Mop! A Cleaning Lady for a Mop!”

Have you ever been driven to madness?

Categories: cleaning Coffee disgruntled mom Family Dynamics family, mothers, siblings, children, life fun funny House Cleaning Humor Life Martha Stewart mop motherhood musings my life parenting raising children random thoughts Relationship's Richard the III Richare the III spousal conflicts stay at home tassimo thoughts

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Darcie Cameron is a RYT 200 who believes Yoga is a gift that is accessible to everyone with proper modifications, a patient smile and just taking the time to breathe. One of the greatest presents you will ever unwrap is when you connect your mind, body and spirit in perfect sync with your own breath. Connect with Darcie on Facebook

20 replies

  1. UG. I have GIVEN UP getting my husband to do the laundry. He doesn’t do it to my standards, and if I say anything I get the “seriously crazy lady, you could just do it yourself”.

    On a related note, I am doing an experiment at home. Last Saturday my husband picked up toilet paper and brought it home. My teenage daughter took it upstairs and left it in the middle of the bathroom floor. It is still sitting there, except that people have now opened it and removed two rolls. BUT NOT PUT IT AWAY. I am waiting to see how long it will actually sit out there until someone else get tired of it.

    1. LOL! It sounds like my house! I’ve done that test, after a week, I announce it’s a test, and they all give me this blank look of why? So Infuriating! I understand your pain :O

  2. I love the line”is that what your mother did?” Sadly, (or beter put luckily} i think Marc is better with household chores than I am

  3. haha, what is it about men’s definition of “clean” that is so drastically different than a woman’s?! Hilarious! (though I’m sure it’s wasn’t so funny at the time!)

  4. We have a firm rule in our household. Neither of us does the other’s laundry. The rest of the chores are up for grabs – meaning I get to do most being mostly at home.

  5. My son started doing his own laundry in middle school because he was dissatisfied with my laundry rhythm. Fine by me. I also have a husband who is much better at cleaning than I am.

  6. Love the pandemonium and chaos that makes up a family unit! In defense of your husband…who apparently doesn’t watch Martha Stewart, we feel entitled to take these ‘short-cuts’ because we our ‘incapacity’ is usually granted a pass. My wife has forbidden me to touch the laundry b/c I feign incompetence in ‘laundrical arts’. I accidentally washed the cat once…one little mistake and you’re branded for life!!! She and the cat will never forgive me!

    1. Hahaha! I bet they never forgave you! Sometimes I wish we could all be primal and just stroll about in the buff! Never to care about folding all of those pesky clothes again! But then I’m brought back to reality remembering the climate that I live in…

  7. I have a friend who has gone a little crazy I think. She walks around rooms straightening things…you just watch her for a while until she turns around and says “What? It’s not EVEN!”

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