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The Buffoon

Over the holiday season my mother dragged me to every mall and outlet store within the city limits of Edmonton. We shopped, shopped, and shopped some more. On one of our particular trips we headed to the West Edmonton Mall.

It was busy, over-crowded, and I felt the energy being sucked from me under the neon mall  lights.  My mother on the other hand was a deal hunting matriarch on the loose and there was no stopping her.

As, we stepped out of the Gap, I was  tired and beginning to wonder when are we going to get out of this place? I heard apish sounds from behind, I paused for a moment, and wondered was this buffoon speaking to me?

I assessed the  buffoon, out of his natural habit, as he clomped past us with his girlfriend pushing a little toddler in the stroller.

He exclaimed, “Watch where you going! You Dumb Bitch!”

I paused for a moment, “Excuse me!”

“Yes! You! You F*!kin’ Bitch!”

My ears went red, I looked at his girlfriend, the stroller, as he trudged by, I exclaimed, ” Watch your language! Watch how you speak in front of your child!”

His girlfriend looked at me, looked at her boyfriend, and exclaimed “Did she just tell us how to speak in front of our child?” And as she said this – visibly upset, she smartly disappeared into the crowd. Obvious, that she wanted no part of what the unpredictable buffoon would do next…

The buffoon then charged towards me. I panicked, began to assess the situation (not a mall cop in sight), and saw my sixty-seven year old mother ready as back up, clutching her heavy purse, ready to clobber him over the head.

He exclaimed, “What did you just f*!kin’ say to me!”

I said, “Your acting like a Moron! And you should watch your language around your child.”

I stared him down, my ears were flaming red, I felt my hands shaking, never have experienced such ignorance! Especially, from a complete stranger in a shopping mall!

Once again, the buffoon exclaimed, “Dumb F*!kin’ Bitch! Don’t tell me how to speak in front my child!”

“You should lead by example and right now your acting like a moron!”

On that he turned on his heels, to catch-up his girlfriend, swearing a blue streak a mile high. I  looked at mother “Did that just happen? I can’t believe he has a child?”

My mom looked at me and replied, “I know dear!  What a buffoon! Don’t worry if he comes back I’ll clip him in the ear!”

It was nice to know my Mom still had some spunk left in her ready to kick this  buffoons ass!

 I also know the moment he began swearing at me, I felt rage, anger, and judging. I judged him, his girlfriend, and wondered what type of life would they provide for this child? We as parents are role models for our children, and should be teaching them important values such as courtesy, respect, and kindness to strangers. If we don’t who will?

If he has the ability to swear at a complete stranger with no rational thought than what ability does he have to raise this child? So, yes, the moment the buffoon began his tirade –  I  judged him.

I realize I didn’t handle this situation with tact or grace. I felt anger, resentment, and bitterness. But I wonder could I have handled this differently, and if so how do you deal with a buffoon? Any suggestions.

Categories: buffoon conflict Family Dynamics funny Humor Life motherhood musings my life parenting raising children random thoughts Relationship's thoughts verbal assault

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Darcie Cameron is a RYT 200 who believes Yoga is a gift that is accessible to everyone with proper modifications, a patient smile and just taking the time to breathe. One of the greatest presents you will ever unwrap is when you connect your mind, body and spirit in perfect sync with your own breath. Connect with Darcie on Facebook

13 replies

  1. I think you handled the situation great, and you should be proud of yourself that you made a moron walk away from YOU. However, in retrospect, you probably should have just walked away after the “excuse me”. We live in a scary world, where people can be totally crazy. He could have really gotten violent…. I remember once I was in the car with my mom and someone cut us off or something silly like that. We both started yelled / gestured at the driver. When we got to a traffic light, the guy got out of his car and started banging on our windshield. Fortunately another man got saw it, and started walking our way, which scared the crazy guy away. I will never forget how scared I was at that moment. So, I tend to bite my tongue. Better be safe than sorry…. But, on another note, I really feel sorry for the kid. He has no good role models.

    1. Wow! That sounds like a very scary experince. You never know what triggers people…I know, I should have walked away but he caught me at the wrong moment. I just remember as he came back towards having this sinking feeling my stomach that he might retaliate by hitting me. I believe I was just fortunate enough that the mall was crowded and I had my mom for back-up 🙂

  2. Holy. CRAP. I’m baffled by the behavior of the buffoons of the world. I have no idea how I would have handled that, but for my money, I’d say you, my dear, were RIGHT ON!

    And, BTW, your mom ROCKS!

    1. I think I should do a study of various buffoons of the world. I think we could solve a lot of problems in this world if we could teach them rational thought!

      My Mom would love to know that she Rocks 🙂 She is one tough cookie…As a teenager I had to learn to outrun her on the stairs before I got the clog to the butt for testing her patience :O

  3. I admire your bravery! And your mom is awesome! No wonder you aren’t afraid of confrontation, with her as a role model. If this had been me, I would have just pretended I didn’t hear him the first time because that’s how I was raised, to ignore my tormenters. My mother would do the same, obviously. So I love that you both are so different and wish I had a little more of that inside me.

    While I hate judging others, especially parents, there are time when it is impossible not to. It’s not the swearing so much from this guy as the attitude he has towards others. Clearly he thinks the world revolves around him and everyone is out to get him. He has no consideration for anyone else. He will pass this on to his child the way your mother passed her spunk on to you. That’s what I worry about and that’s what I judge, fairly or no. It makes me angry and sad.

    By the way, I don’t think I knew you lived in Edmonton before. I grew up in Alberta and my best friend is currently in Edmonton. No wonder you are so brave! You have to be in all that cold weather.

    1. I definitely, not brave, probably just foolish! I don’t know what got into me….Usually, I would just ignore the thug but to be in such a public place and behave like that in front of your child is ridiculous! That’s what made me mad! And I did judge him, I have friends very near and dear to me who would love to have children who are dealing with fertility treatments and red tape adoptions. It’s just frustrating to know this buffoon can reproduce…

      I know – it sounds harsh. But what will he teach this child? And if he is like this with a complete stranger |wonder how does he treat his girlfriend? I suspect she has a very rough life with this piece of work. I can only hope for the best that one will change and realize that they need to lead by example and do the best they can to raise this child in a healthy environment. The whole situation also makess me angry and sad.

      We moved to Edmonton almost three years ago for it’s fruitful economy 🙂 It’s not a bad little spot! This is the first winter which hasn’t been biting cold and I’m forcing myself more outside each day. However, I do miss the ocean, my friends, family, pubs, and good poutine. There really is no place like home 🙂

  4. I think you handled it maturely and wonderfully. It’s amazing who in this world is allowed to breed, and who in this world that deserved to breed but cannot.

    One can only imagine that if he treats random strangers this way, how he treats his girlfriend and child.

      1. Ooo very true, that’s my view on things that happen to me. “Why”.. why did _________ affect me in the manner in which it had? Everything a person does stems from two basic emotions: Love or Fear.

        Was it a fight or flight situation?
        If it was a fight situation, what made you put the defenses up?

        It’s common that I find myself asking those very questions.

      2. It’s true! I know, I didn’t handle the situation well, but how could I of handle it better. Should I have ignored it? But then I felt by ignoring him that I was being meek. And from his body language and choice of words – I felt by letting him act this way, he had won. It was an odd feeling.

        I felt anger and I wonder what is the most rational response to this situation? I think I was coming from a place of fear and wanted to defend myself and my mother. I know when he charged back at me, I didn’t back down, because that would allow him to win. I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing his bullying tactics worked…

        But in the end, all I can do, is look back, and wonder how could I handle this situation better, if it ever happened again?

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