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My Husband has Mistaken Me for Sarah Palin

Some men,  buy women flowers, expensive jewelry, or something pretty for their wives on their Birthday. Oh! But not my honey! He likes to think outside the box, to get in touch with his wives inner feelings, and get her the most surprising gift ever. Yes! It was surprising! Head – Scratching (and no it wasn’t head lice)! But it was one of those speechless presents that you wonder – do I really send off that kind of signal?

The past couple of weeks have been hectic with Mr. MBA recovering from a mild surgery. I’ve become nurse, taxi driver,cleaning lady, head chef, volunteer, and exterior Christmas decorator all wrapped into one.

It was just yesterday, I strung the outdoor Christmas lights, impaled myself with a tree branch,  fell backwards off the ladder, only to be tripped by Frosty the Snowman. It was one of those comical moments,  you know the neighbors, are hiding behind their curtains, laughing at the mad girl, swearing off a storm of expletives.

So, as I marched into the house, I fantasized this would  be the Birthday year I would get a punch card for hot yoga glasses, or a gift certificate to a luxurious spa to soothe away all of  my stress.

So, I woke up this morning, ready to open my present, imagining something glorious!

I ripped open the package, to discover a case of beer, and a hundred-dollar gift certificate to the shooting range. I was tired, speechless, I looked at the beer, and then looked at the gift certificate.

“You got me a hundred-dollar gift certificate to the shooting range?”

Mr. MBA eyes gleamed with pride, “Isn’t it great?”

“Ummm! I guess!”

“I thought you would like it! You’ve talked about going in the past.”

I half smiled “Oh! But I was kinda half-joking about it.”

“You  don’t like it!”

“It’s not that I don’t like it! It’s just I’m wondering…Do I look like Sarah Palin to you?”

“Well kinda.”

“What!?”

“Well in a good way!You like to camp, hike and fish. Plus, you kinda look like  her when you pull your hair back, and wear your glasses. Also, when you have a little too much to drink your little accent comes out.”

“Ugh! I don’t have an accent!”

“But I thought you would like it! It would be a good way to relieve the stress and have fun!”

I looked at the beer. I  looked at the gift certificate.  And thought what the heck!  

 I looked at Mr. MBA,  and with my best Scarlett accent exclaimed, ” I can shoot straight,  if I don’t have to shoot to far…Just don’t ever mistaken me for Palin, again!”

So, this hectic season, who needs spa appointments, hot yoga, and expensive jewelry. Hell! I got a gift certificate to the shooting range and I’m going to enjoy every stress-free minute of it!

Categories: birthday gifts birthdays friendship fun funny Humor Life love Marriage motherhood musings my life random thoughts Relationship's sarah palin shooting range stress reduction Surviving the Holidays the act of giving thoughts

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Darcie

Darcie Cameron is a RYT 200 who believes Yoga is a gift that is accessible to everyone with proper modifications, a patient smile and just taking the time to breathe. One of the greatest presents you will ever unwrap is when you connect your mind, body and spirit in perfect sync with your own breath. Connect with Darcie on Facebook https://www.facebook.com/darciecameronlovesyoga

10 replies

  1. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! I am sorry, but this was hysterical…. Don’t hate me, but I think that lessons at a shooting range sounds like a lot of fun. It was something I always wanted to do. My dad, a corrections officer, always promised to take me when I grew up. But, unfortunately, he passed away before I did… Have a “blast” at the range.

    1. I think it be fun! It will make for an interesting day! I’m just not sure what he was thinking when he bought the gift certificate…

      I always find this time of year rough when I think of my dad – we use to do lots together and Christmas was one of his favorite seasons. Perhaps, you and Marc should give the range a go in honour of your Dad. I bet he would be looking down in heaven with a big smile on his face 🙂

  2. Happy birthday!

    I don’t know, I’d probably have the same reaction as you at first. But it’s a pretty cool idea for a gift all in all. Shooting a gun is an item on my life list so I’d probably get over my shock eventually and enjoy the experience.

    Have fun and good luck!

    1. Thanks! I’ll let you know – how I do! I’m thinking I might pump myself up with some hard rock music before going in and firing off a round. I wonder if I’ll need to accesorize my outfit that day :O

  3. LOL!

    Happy, happy birthday! You will have a great time at the shooting range. I love target practice, though I’ve never gone to an actual range. Pulling off an accurate shot is a lot of fun.

    But what I really want to know is what that practice at the range winds up doing for your helicopter wolf hunting skills 😉

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