I had a dream! It was an awful dream! I had frizzy hair, wore a denim acid wash dress, and in my pocket was a crumbled note. On the note was a list which I diligently kept reading. I began to stress out that I couldn’t accomplish everything on my list. In an instant my blood pressure was rising! And in one quick delirious moment I was being grilled by Nancy Grace, she was asking me a strange question, “What about the list? Can you tell me about the list?”
I couldn’t answer…I awoke, my heart beating, the list in my head, and the sounds of Nancy Grace grilling in my ear. What the hell was my subconscious telling me?
I put on my four am pot of coffee and pondered the big questions, why was I dressed like I belonged in the Breakfast Club? And what was the list? And why does Nancy Grace stress me out? Even in reality I see her on TV I want to confess to her – that every now and then I am too lazy to organize the recyclables. In fact, I hate organizing garbage, it’s the worst thing a Type B personality has ever been expected to do.
I decided to blame this dream on the recent reoccurrence of eighties fads (realization that I’m old) and the stress of the dreaded daily list. Lists are another one those facts of life which Type B gals like myself loathe. So, I evaluated my recent list and decided there are five things I should never list.
1) Chores – I will no longer list chores, it’s obvious they need to be done, so why do I have to write about it.
2) Workouts – it’s evident, I have to run to fight the muffin top, but do I need to list it?
3) Gardening – why am I listing “water the plants”
4) Call Mother in Law – That one always stresses me out! Just the thought of it! And I always postpone the call to tomorrow which never happens.
5) Organize and throw out toys! The most boring job in the world! And I’m never going to do it! Until I impale my foot on a piece of Lego or Tonka Truck.
It is by removing these five daily activities from my list. My life actually looks more productive, and stress free. Perhaps, this is what Nancy Grace was grilling me about, I bet even now if she asked me, “Why do you have such repetitive lists?”
My reply would be, “I have no idea.”
I would then blink and look mystified at the camera.
