“I have your obituary in my car to keep me safe and so that I can look at you and think about you every day.”
I wondered does this spammer know something about my future that I do not? Was I already dead? I began to question my fate and existence for most of the afternoon.
So I took a swallow of fish oil and gagged! I knew from that awful taste I was still alive! Thank God!
It was from that one comment which inspired me to write my own blogger obituary:
Belle was a versatile blogger and loving mother who leaves behind two sons, and a wonderful husband. She loved to sing in the shower, do silly dances throughout the house, and mortify her two children with an array of questions about their day. Her toots will be deeply missed as it was an aroma which could stop a lion in its tracks forcing it to run the other way.
It is in her life she believed her greatest accomplishment was raising her two boys to be strong men with a great sense of humor. She also believed each day no matter how solemn should have a few moments of laughter.
In the event of her death she requested to be buried in a red dress, fancy hat, and ruby-red slippers. Belle also vehemently voiced instead of a wake “where people could have one last memory of her with bad make-up and a grim face” that there is to be a party held in her memory at the Black Horse.
She expects everyone to have at least two shots of tequila and six pints of beer with the sounds of Billy Joel playing in the background. It is also mandatory for at least one drunken sot to pass out in her Mother’s front lawn just for memories sake.
Now lets hope the other obituary that the spammer has on the dashboard of his car is keeping him safe because it is definitely not mine!
What would your blogger obituary look like?