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The Three Thousand Dollar Cheque

As my husband and I walked behind the couple at the dog park we couldn’t help but overhear the end of an argument.

“I don’t think 2500 a month will cover the cost of her condo, clothing allowance, bills, and car insurance!”

The husband exasperated lifted up his arms and brought them down to his side, “What is enough? She is in university.”

The wife looked at him, “We will write her a cheque for three thousand a month and that should be enough!”

It was with that they veered right and stormed away!

I  looked at  my husband to check if heard what I just heard in front of us. Perhaps, it is with righteous indignation I wonder who the hell gives their daughter in university a cheque for three thousand dollars a month to cover the cost of clothing allowance, car insurance, and bills.

Do you see something wrong with this picture?

Categories: finances Humor Life NaBloPoMo

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belleofthecarnival

I am the head clown in my family's circus act! Most days I can be seen with my noise stuck in a good book, spilling coffee down my shirt, and aimlessly wandering about wondering where did I put my glasses.

You can always drop me line at belleofthecarnival@hotmail.com

42 replies

  1. You mean other than Princess is getting $1,000 more per month than I spend on rent, utilities, gas, groceries, insurance and miscellaneous, and someone is just writing a check and handing it to her?

    Good grief.

  2. it’s totally wrong but is the reality.
    there are people who do not understand the value of money neither understand the importance of bringing up children to be self reliant. around me i see school children carrying iphones and my jaw drops everytime with the absurdity of it…

    1. Our first house was a mini-home on an acreage in the middle of the woods. I still miss it. Ahh! The memories! I hope she really appreciates her townhouse and realizes the cost her parent put into it for her. I know someone who is very similar and she just expects it all handed to her…

      1. Oh, they bought it for her JUST for three years she would live in it while she was at school. They put it on the market the last month of so of classes. (We went to school in Montreal. She was American.)

  3. It may be the parent’s fault, but our society parents us to spoil our kids. Believe me, my daughter is in 11th grade now and it’s like all her teachers, people who are discussing her limitless future with her, are following some outdated script that literally does not take into account the fact that a limitless future requires money. They talk to her about all these out of state colleges (that are 2 to 3 times the tuition of an in state school) as if every loving parent plans to go massively in debt or saddle their youngster with debt for an undergrad education. In state schools are not considered “dream” schools, they are called “safety” schools. So if you don’t want to sink in debt right when you should and need to be planning for your own retirement you aren’t dreaming big enough and if you only want to spend $12,0000 a year on just tuition alone you are “a loser who plays it safe”.

    My daughter also takes violin lessons (expensive and a privilege, I know) and has for the last 9 years. She’s musical; it’s her thing, she doesn’t do sports, so we invested in lessons and when the time was right a Chinese violin that her last violin teacher said was very good – it took us 5 years to pay off. Last week her new music teacher, who is filling her head with dreams of these crazy expensive private colleges, tells her it’s not her fault she doesn’t sound good, it’s that she has “a bad violin”. Also, in the eyes of this teacher the in-state university her father and I and her father’s mother attended is just terrible, not good enough for me daughter. I had to smile. The woman clearly holds a set of values I do not share. But to my daughter, the woman knows things that are important, and I, who will be expected to finance this “important path” do not know things that are important.

    It makes me crazy sometimes. Even if my kid goes to a “safety”, I’ve sold out kind of school, we’re talking between $20,000 and $30,000 a year for tuition and living expenses. My husband and I both paid for our college education, he lived at home because it was near the college he attended. But it was truly cheap back then. My undergrad education 20 years ago cost approx $2000 a year. That same school now charges approx $13,000 a year; only 10 years ago it cost $6000 a year. The prices are skyrocketing. And even when I graduated with around $5,000 in debt, and had to get a low paying entry level job and start my new post-college life, having that much debt seemed horrible. It took me years to pay that off. I really hate the idea of my kid starting life out of college with a debt equal to my first mortgage.

    Yet there are still parents, like those in your post, who are willing to finance The Dream School, and the Dream college life. In my daughter’s eyes, she is being taught to see that princess’s experience as something available for every child. Anymore if a parent is prudent and wishes to teach their child a similar value, they are thought not just to lack cash, but actual imagination. What a sad statement about our society when the amount of money we invest in a given endeavor is equated with our innate level of passion and inspiration for such. Nothing could be further from the truth.

    1. I believe when we go beyond our financial limits to help our children live their dream that we are living through them. We have to teach them to be self-reliant and figure out how to live there dreams without making the path for them. I see this all the time in sports and coaches have said to parents “If your child is good there should be no financial limit that you will be unwilling to spend.” Sometimes I wonder do people sell the kool-aid dream to line their pockets that much further or do they truly further.

      We are fortunate in Canada that tuition is half the cost of American universities and many Americans do chose Canada as an option to send their kids to university for a high-quality education that doesn’t break the bank even on international tuition. Dalhousie University in Halifax NS has a very good music program and it might be the perfect alternative for your daughter.

  4. This sounds like a dream! Except, since I attended the University of Western Ontario in London and know this to be the reality. And that was 20 years ago! One of my roommates loved to run up the credit card daddy gave her with clothing that she would wear once or twice — and then just throw in a pile by the washing machine. She never actually washed a single article of clothing the entire year I lived with her. She just bought more with her magic credit card.
    Thankfully, my mama raised me right – even though she had very little money to spare and I had to also work while attending full time university — and taught me how to do my own laundry. I consider it fate that my laundry-challenged roommate was the same size as me.
    And it was thus, I was able to gain an expensive wardrobe of designer clothes — for the mere cost of a bottle of laundry soap.
    The Morale? Money can’t buy smart. But if you work really hard and save your pennies, you can go to school with dumb people and steal their stuff.

  5. Not really teaching a sense of independence – I was pretty much on my own for personal expenses at 14, but I was making a little money than too. Can I get in on that plan – have not seen a raise in 5 years – ha! Just kidding – a little insane though!

    1. It is tough! We always had to have a job growing up so I can’t fathom someone just handing you 3000 dollars a month to get by…As well, how much control do these parents have over their adult children? Are they still making decisions for them?

  6. I used to work in student housing and most of the 900 residents in the two buildings I was Account Manager for led the life you describe. I was FLOORED one day when I was walking back to the buildings from lunch and had two of my residents pass by, one telling the other that she’d blown her allowance for the week (yes, WEEK) on “two pairs of Manolo’s, a Chanel bag and some Gucci sunglasses.” I just had to shake my head in wonderment…

      1. LOL The thing was… none of those girls appreciated what they were buying, it was only bragging rights. They used the things for a few months, if at all, and then tossed things into the donation piles at the end of the school year.

        I have taken on a much more… I don’t know, “holistic” maybe, approach to “things”. If I don’t look at it frequently, and I don’t find joy from it – I won’t have it in my house. I want to want what I have, even if it’s very little.

        On the plus side… the less that I have, the less I need to keep track of… and the less I have to dust/clean.

      2. I believe that is the most frustrating part! I would have dived into the bin for those donations ;)

        I purchased my very first grown up kitchen table this year. And it was a nice feeling to have saved for it! It really makes you appreciate everything you have more.

  7. Wow. You should have gone up to them, tapped them on the shoulder, and said “Excuse me, but people like you are part of the reason why so many kids can’t do anything for themselves! You aren’t doing your kid any favors, and the excessive spoiling will only be to her detriment!” That girl will always expect handouts and never learn to stand on her own two feet. And, she probably has a very skewed view of what reality is like. When she gets out into the real world, and her parents are no longer there to help her, she is in for a real eye opener.

  8. (As an old man) I’ve said it before and (as a grumpy one, to boot), I’ll say it again – this new generation will be one of the last, simply because they’ve never learned to provide for themselves. And when mummsie and daddums turn all worm foodish-like, they’ll simply starve to death as a result.

  9. Pity you didn’t get their name and address. I could write to them asking if they would adopt me, and would they mind buying me a new wide screen TV as my old one just doesn’t cut it any more

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