I once had ambitions just like Richard the III and dreamed of my own matriarchal kingdom. It would be a shiny beacon that would make Martha Stewart envious of my organizational skills. In the past week I have washed, scrubbed toilets, and de-cluttered almost all of the closets. It was only within moments my homes squeaky clean appearance was tarnished… 
The aftermath of my madness was questionable, but what lead to this madness? Was it that I gave Mr. MBA too much free rein last night when he did the laundry? Or was it giving the kids too much freedom in their room not policing where they put their toys and laundry? I’m unsure where or when my madness occurred but when it did everyone took cover!
I awoke this morning groggy, getting breakfast ready, packing lunches, listening to the sound of my coffee brewing in the tassimo (my one trusted friend ) it was when my little man yelled, “Mom where are my socks?”
“Your Dad put them away last night they should be in your top drawer.”
“They’re not!”
My second son, “Mine are not either!”
My husband came trudging down the stairs in his wrinkled dress pants and shirt. I gave him the once over “Did you stuff the dryer full?”
“Yes!”
“Why would you do that everything is going to be wrinkled!”
“Don’t worry I’ll fix it.”
He went downstairs and put his wrinkled clothes in the empty dryer. I thought to myself not a word just I just need my coffee.
“Mom! I still don’t have any socks!”
I wandered upstairs and looked at his room. My ears began to turn red “Where is your floor? What have you done? I just cleaned this yesterday!”
He gave me his sweet eyes, “I don’t know!”
I went back to the kitchen to discover the dog in the garbage. It was everywhere the remnants of last nights spaghetti sauce. I was biting my tongue, keeping my cool, the dog gave me the look, and took cover in her crate.
Mr. MBA reappeared smoothed out and ready to face his day! “Did you put away the kids clothes last night?”
“Yup!”
“That’s funny I can’t find their socks. I’ll go look in the laundry room.”
As I hit the bottom of the basement steps, and entered the family room. I looked and discovered a pile of clean socks in the centre of the floor.
“Mr. MBA could you come here!”
I heard the foot steps slowly come down the stairs. “Yes!”
“What’s this?”
“It’s the kids socks.”
“Why are they in the middle of the floor?”
“I thought they could just match as they go!”
“You thought? You thought? You thought they could match and go?”
“Is that what your mother did?”
“Well no!”
“So do you think I want to look at a pile of socks every time I watch TV?”
Mr. MBA slinked up the stairs “I think I better go now.”
All of my Better Home and Garden dreams thwarted with a blink of an eye. I felt dizzy with the onset of madness and all I could do was declare “A Mop! A Mop! A Cleaning Lady for a Mop!”
Have you ever been driven to madness?
This is why I love reading other mommy blogs. I know I’m not alone.
Hahaha! You are definitely not alone
Hahaha! I suppose that’s marginally better than him answering, “Oh, I just expected if I left them alone, they’d mate and make up for all the socks devoured by the sock gnomes over the years!” :p
LOL! Don’t give him ideas! But it was probably what he was thinking..
UG. I have GIVEN UP getting my husband to do the laundry. He doesn’t do it to my standards, and if I say anything I get the “seriously crazy lady, you could just do it yourself”.
On a related note, I am doing an experiment at home. Last Saturday my husband picked up toilet paper and brought it home. My teenage daughter took it upstairs and left it in the middle of the bathroom floor. It is still sitting there, except that people have now opened it and removed two rolls. BUT NOT PUT IT AWAY. I am waiting to see how long it will actually sit out there until someone else get tired of it.
LOL! It sounds like my house! I’ve done that test, after a week, I announce it’s a test, and they all give me this blank look of why? So Infuriating! I understand your pain :O
I love the line”is that what your mother did?” Sadly, (or beter put luckily} i think Marc is better with household chores than I am
You are very lucky! Marc sounds like a keeper! If he ever feels the need to clean send him my way…
and he cooks too! I should rent him out for some quick cash
LOL! You would make a fortune! You could call your company Rent-A-Marc
haha, what is it about men’s definition of “clean” that is so drastically different than a woman’s?! Hilarious! (though I’m sure it’s wasn’t so funny at the time!)
I blame it all on his mother
Ugh…I hate matching socks! But match as you go is not an option. Boo and Radley are in charge of sock matching.
Wise move I think I need to put someone in charge of sock matching…An update he socks are still in the middle of the family room. Ugh!
We have a firm rule in our household. Neither of us does the other’s laundry. The rest of the chores are up for grabs – meaning I get to do most being mostly at home.
I love that rule! I can’t wait to reach the age when the kids can do their own laundry
My son started doing his own laundry in middle school because he was dissatisfied with my laundry rhythm. Fine by me. I also have a husband who is much better at cleaning than I am.
Love the pandemonium and chaos that makes up a family unit! In defense of your husband…who apparently doesn’t watch Martha Stewart, we feel entitled to take these ‘short-cuts’ because we our ‘incapacity’ is usually granted a pass. My wife has forbidden me to touch the laundry b/c I feign incompetence in ‘laundrical arts’. I accidentally washed the cat once…one little mistake and you’re branded for life!!! She and the cat will never forgive me!
Hahaha! I bet they never forgave you! Sometimes I wish we could all be primal and just stroll about in the buff! Never to care about folding all of those pesky clothes again! But then I’m brought back to reality remembering the climate that I live in…
I have a friend who has gone a little crazy I think. She walks around rooms straightening things…you just watch her for a while until she turns around and says “What? It’s not EVEN!”