Some men, buy women flowers, expensive jewelry, or something pretty for their wives on their Birthday. Oh! But not my honey! He likes to think outside the box, to get in touch with his wives inner feelings, and get her the most surprising gift ever. Yes! It was surprising! Head – Scratching (and no it wasn’t head lice)! But it was one of those speechless presents that you wonder – do I really send off that kind of signal?
The past couple of weeks have been hectic with Mr. MBA recovering from a mild surgery. I’ve become nurse, taxi driver,cleaning lady, head chef, volunteer, and exterior Christmas decorator all wrapped into one.
It was just yesterday, I strung the outdoor Christmas lights, impaled myself with a tree branch, fell backwards off the ladder, only to be tripped by Frosty the Snowman. It was one of those comical moments, you know the neighbors, are hiding behind their curtains, laughing at the mad girl, swearing off a storm of expletives.
So, as I marched into the house, I fantasized this would be the Birthday year I would get a punch card for hot yoga glasses, or a gift certificate to a luxurious spa to soothe away all of my stress.
So, I woke up this morning, ready to open my present, imagining something glorious!
I ripped open the package, to discover a case of beer, and a hundred-dollar gift certificate to the shooting range. I was tired, speechless, I looked at the beer, and then looked at the gift certificate.
“You got me a hundred-dollar gift certificate to the shooting range?”
Mr. MBA eyes gleamed with pride, “Isn’t it great?”
“Ummm! I guess!”
“I thought you would like it! You’ve talked about going in the past.”
I half smiled “Oh! But I was kinda half-joking about it.”
“You don’t like it!”
“It’s not that I don’t like it! It’s just I’m wondering…Do I look like Sarah Palin to you?”
“Well in a good way!You like to camp, hike and fish. Plus, you kinda look like her when you pull your hair back, and wear your glasses. Also, when you have a little too much to drink your little accent comes out.”
“Ugh! I don’t have an accent!”
“But I thought you would like it! It would be a good way to relieve the stress and have fun!”
I looked at the beer. I looked at the gift certificate. And thought what the heck!
I looked at Mr. MBA, and with my best Scarlett accent exclaimed, ” I can shoot straight, if I don’t have to shoot to far…Just don’t ever mistaken me for Palin, again!”
So, this hectic season, who needs spa appointments, hot yoga, and expensive jewelry. Hell! I got a gift certificate to the shooting range and I’m going to enjoy every stress-free minute of it!